


Hacker Voice: I'm In

by CutePaladins, Zuzonicorn



Series: The Lion's Den (Stripper AU) [3]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Gen, Stripper!AU, pidge is here
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-22
Updated: 2017-10-22
Packaged: 2019-01-21 04:45:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,260
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12449925
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CutePaladins/pseuds/CutePaladins, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zuzonicorn/pseuds/Zuzonicorn
Summary: Pidge uses the vents.





	Hacker Voice: I'm In

**Author's Note:**

> I think I'm the only one still doing this, so come find me at [on tumblr](http://zuzonicorn.tumblr.com/).

It was Friday, and every table in the club was filled.  All three stages were being used, Lance,  _ Azul _ , on the main stage, with Shiro,  _ Champion _ , and Keith,  _ Kwang _ , on the two side stages.  The trio had been dancing all night, almost non-stop, barely any time between sets to change outfits.  It was by far the busiest night in the 3 months since Keith and Lance started dancing.

_ Just Do Me Right  _ by Slick Beats ended, and to the disappointment of their customers, Shiro, Keith, and Lance exited the stages.  Another song began playing, keeping up the atmosphere inside.

Shiro led the way to the bar and sat on a stool near the corner.  The other two sat on either side of him.  The bartender, Coran, slid a Jack and Coke in front of Shiro.  He was quick to tip his head back and swallow most of the drink in a single gulp.

“So,” Coran said to the younger two, “what’ll it be, boys?”

Lance put a finger to his chin, an over-the-top way to show he was thinking.  “I’ll take a  _ Mexican Sea Breeze _ , and Keith over there will take a  _ Fuck Me From Behind _ .”

Keith spluttered, face flushing more red than the lipstick he was wearing.  “What the  _ fuck _ , Lance?!  I don’t want that!  I can order on my own!”  He reached over Shiro, who leaned back helpfully, to swat at Lance.

Coran turned and started mixing the drinks with a smirk on his face.

“Oh, come on Keith,” Lance pestered, “we all know you’re gay as hell and wouldn’t mind a little bit of Shi--”

He was cut off by Keith throwing a handful of peanuts at his face.

“Sh-shut up, dick.”

Sometime during the exchange, Shiro had turned around to talk to Allura, too obviously mesmerized by her beauty to focus on Lance’s words.

Keith continued to throw peanuts at Lance’s face, even after Coran had made their drinks and placed them in front of the appropriate dancer.  Eventually they were less hostile and more lighthearted, gently thrown onto the bar for Lance to pick up and eat.

After a bit, Allura stepped back from Shiro, pulling him up by his hand.  “Azul, sorry to cut your break short, but could you please get back on stage?  The customers are in need of some proper entertainment, and your hips do wonders.”

“Well, my dear Allura,” he finished his drink in a long swig, “these hips don’t lie.”  He slammed his empty glass on the counter and sashayed away towards the stage.

Coran picked up a tablet from behind the bar.  “I’m going to take a gamble on what he wants his next song to be.”  He tapped away at his tablet for a few seconds, then picked up a microphone.  “Next up on center stage, Azul!”  He got the signal from the side of the stage to start the song.

 

**_Ladies up in here tonight_ **

**_No fighting_ **

**_We got the refugees up in here (no fighting)_ **

**_No fighting_ **

 

Azul made his way onstage, stepping in time with the music.  This song was all about the hips, so he made sure his hips were the center of everyone’s attention, especially a certain  _ someone _ still sitting at the bar.

 

**_I never really knew that she could dance like this_ **

**_She makes a man wants to speak Spanish_ **

**_Como se llama (si)_ **

**_Bonita (si)_ **

**_Mi casa (Shakira Shakira), su casa_ **

 

His hips swayed continually, with a little extra emphasis on the ‘ _ si _ ’.  He grabbed the pole mid-stage and spun around it once, feet still on the floor.

 

**_Oh baby when you talk like that_ **

**_You make a woman go mad_ **

 

He climbed the pole using only his arms.

 

**_So be wise (si) and keep on (si)_ **

**_Reading the signs of my body (uno, dos, tres, cuatro)_ **

 

Once he was at the top, he spun down rhythmically, landing on the floor in a split on ‘body’.  He pulled himself up using the pole as the next line started.

 

**_And I'm on tonight you know my hips don't lie_ **

**_And I'm starting to feel it's right_ **

**_All the attraction, the tension_ **

**_Don't you see baby, this is--_ **

 

**_\--gasolina (dame mas gasolina!)_ **

**_Como le encanta la gasolina (dame mas gasolina!)_ **

**_A ella le gusta la gasolina (dame mas gasolina!)_ **

**_Como le encanta la gasolina (dame mas gasolina!)_ **

 

There was clear panic on Azul’s face, even as he easily dropped to the floor and into a reggaeton dance.  The patrons of the club whooped, oblivious to the confusion of the staff, only interested in the provocative dance on the stage.

_ Coran, what the fuck, _ Azul mouthed.  The older man only shrugged helplessly, tapping on the tablet.

He continued to dance to  _ Gasolina _ , watching as Coran and the others had a hushed discussion over the bar.   _ Can someone please tell me what is going on?!  _ he thought, hoping someone would pick up on his telepathic message.

A couple of guys gestured him over, and he gave an unsteady smile as he danced his way over.  They stroked his legs, and one pulled the waistband of the blue and white shorts he was wearing to stuff in a handful of singles.

Lance ran a hand down his chest and smiled in thank you before going back to the pole.  He twirled and climbed the pole, keeping in mind the song was coming to an end.  He climbed to the top, wrapped his legs around, and leaned back.  He was holding on with only his legs, crossed around the pole, and spun around upside down until his hands slammed on the floor with the last beat of the song.  He swore he heard cackling in the booth behind the stage, but shook his head.  He must’ve imagined it; no one had been in there the entire time he had worked there.

He was breathing heavily as he pushed off the pole into a handstand, falling back onto his feet shortly after.  He picked up the money that had and was still being thrown at him before making his way back to the bar.

Mouth open to say something, he was cut off by Allura grabbing the microphone and saying, “I’m sorry, everyone, but we are experiencing some technical difficulties at the moment, so please just wait patiently.  Maybe order something to eat from our kitchen; cheese fries are half off tonight!”  She put down the mic, turning to Lance.

“Okay what the  _ fuck _ ,” he accused.  “What was that?  You’re lucky I was prepared.”

“Yeah,” Keith snorted, “ _ Gasolina _ is his fucking  _ anthem _ .  I bet he dances to it at home all the time.”

“Well, you know what, Keith?  You-- you’re-- you’re  _ gay _ .”

“Yeah, I am, and so are you, so what’s your point?”

“ _ Excuse you _ , I am bisexual, thank you very much--”

Shiro sighed. “Guys.  Enough.”  He turned to Coran, who was still fiddling with the tablet in his hands.  “What happened out there?”

Another clueless shrug from Coran.  “I have no idea.  Maybe something in the booth is on the fritz.  I’ll go check it out.  Allura, the bar?”  He walked out from behind it, making his way to the door off to the side of the stage.

“Of course,” she nodded.

It was barely a minute later when they heard a shout come from the tech room.  Everyone’s head jerked up at the noise, customer and staff alike.

Coran cleared his throat loudly.  “Hun-- ah, Nui, could you come here, please?”

Hunk and Lance shared a confused look, and Hunk shrugged before making his way to the booth.  He exited moments later with what looked like a struggling child thrown over his shoulder and headed towards the office in the back.

Murmurs spread throughout the room, and Allura was quick to grab the mic and don her manager voice.  “I’m sorry, everyone, but it looks like we’re going to have to close up early tonight.”  Groans and protests took place of the murmurs.  “Again, I’m sorry, but we have some urgent business to attend to.  We will reopen tomorrow at 5pm; thank you for coming to the Lion’s Den.”  The guests reluctantly made their way out.

Once the club was clear, the dancers and Allura made their way to the office.  From inside a familiar voice was heard arguing with Coran and Hunk.  Allura opened the door and made her way in.

“--you doing here, Pidge?”

Lance’s eyes widened and he pushed his way the front of the crowd, Keith and Shiro not far behind.

“Pidge?!” they all voiced simultaneously.

Pidge started at the sudden loud noise.  “Oh, wow, Keith is here, too.  And Sh-- Mr. Shirogane.”  Their eyes trailed down all of their bodies.  They snorted.  “Nice outfits.”

Shiro, Keith, and Lance looked down at themselves… and blushed.  Lance was only wearing his blue and white shorts with blue lipstick, Keith in his cropped jacket, fingerless gloves, white miniskirt, and red lipstick, and Shiro was wearing a tuxedo thong with wrists cuffs, his black boots, and black lipstick.

A smirk made it’s way onto Pidge’s face.  “I don’t think I’ve ever seen so many nipples in the same room.”

Their faces became impossibly more red as they covered what little they could with their hands.  Lance even slid behind Shiro.

Hunk waved his hand, pulling the focus back to Pidge.  “Again, what are you doing here, Pidge?”

“I’m only here because  _ Lance _ ”--they tossed an irritated look at Lance--”wouldn’t stop touching my shit.”

“Language, Pidge.”

“I didn’t touch anything!”

“Yes you did, Lance.  Remember my laptop?  The one I spent a whole month and $400 upgrading?  The one you spilled an entire can of _Pepsi_ and _spaghetti_ _sauce_ on?”

Lance opened and closed his mouth, looking not unlike a fish.  “I thought we agreed it was an accident!  I thought you forgave me!”

They rolled their eyes.  “Doesn’t mean I didn’t want revenge,” they mumbled.

“So you followed me to work?’

“Technically, no.”  They tilted their head and continued.  “I looked through your text messages to Keith, and one of them said something about the Lion’s Den, so here I am.”  They looked at Keith.  “By the way, you should definitely go with the black lace ensemble.”

Keith stuttered and covered his blushing face with his hands.

“W-wh-when did you get my phone?” Lance demanded.  “I always have it with me.”

“Not always.  You don’t have it in the shower, Lance.”

Just as Lance’s mouth opened, likely to retaliate, Allura interjected.  “That aside, how did you get in here?  Hunk has been at the door all night.”

“Yes, and how did you get that system up and running?  It hasn’t worked in over a year,” Coran added.

“Both were easy.  I climbed in through the vents.  My family lives in the apartment above the club; I had easy access to the vents from my room.”

“Wait, wait, wait.  You actually crawled through the vents?” Hunk queried.  “I knew you were small and bitter, but wow.  That’s something.”

A shoulder rose and fell in a shrug.  “It certainly wasn’t hard.  Back to the sound system, all I did was remove the back panel to the main system and--”

Their sentence was interrupted by Lance.  “Okay, no one wants to hear your technology nonsense.”

Hunk pouted.  “I want to hear her technology nonsense.”

“Their.”

Everyone turned to the source of the quiet voice.  Pidge was looking at the floor, rubbing their arm.

“What?” questioned Hunk.

“It’s their.”  They looked directly at Hunk.  “‘I want to hear  _ their _ technology nonsense.’  Today is a ‘their’ day for me.”  The sentence ended in a mumble.

“Oh, my gosh, I’m so sorry, I didn’t know!  I shouldn’t have assumed…” he apologized profusely.

Pidge smiled and looked around the room at everyone.  “It’s alright, Hunk.  I’m genderfluid, so it changes depending on the day.  There’s really no way of knowing unless you ask, so it’s okay to ask me.”

Hunk gasped suddenly, eyes wide, hands over mouth.  “ _ Bracelets. _ ”

“Come again?”

“You people need to work on your communication skills,” Keith grumbled under his breath.

“I’m going to make you pronoun bracelets!” Excited, Hunk started to bounce on the balls of his feet.  “You can just put on the color you’re feeling for the day, and no one will have to ask!”

Before Pidge could respond, Allura chimed in.  “Back to the situation at hand.  You got that ancient system to work again?”

Pidge laughed once, cocking out their hip and putting their hand on it.  “What, like it’s hard?”

“Well, our last DJ quit when the system broke over a year ago, and you obviously know how to work the soundboard, so how would you like to come work with us here at the Lion’s Den as our new DJ?” Allura proposed.  She pulled a face.  “Of course, you’re clearly underage, so no one can know about this.”

Pidge’s face lit up.  “Really?  That’d be cool.  I need something to do in the afternoons after college, anyway.”

“Wait, you’re in college?”  Allura asked, perplexed.

“Yeah, they’re in my astronomy class with Keith, Lance, and Hunk,” Shiro told her.  He had been silent for a while, sneaking out and back into the room, now with pants.

“I skipped a couple of grades.  I graduated high school when I was 13,” Pidge added.

Coran clapped.  “Well, then it shouldn’t be a problem getting you here after school.  And if your parents need you, you can just pop on upstairs.  So, welcome to the crew!”

Lance cheered.  “Welcome to the Lion’s Den, kid.”


End file.
